It looks like we are onto month 24, or officially 2 years in this infertility struggle. I learned on Tuesday that our first attempt at IUI did not work even though both Dr. Terry and my nurse Cindy were very optimistic about my egg size and Mike’s sample. It’s incredibly disheartening, especially because I truly thought in my heart of hearts and deep in my soul that this was going to be the month. It was probably the hope and anticipation of results from doing something new that really had me believing it was finally our time instead of actual symtoms.
In the midst of waiting for these results, we finally had our appointment up at the University of Utah Center for Reproductive Medicine, which was a good thing. They validated that we were on the right track and everything we were doing was necessary. The Dr. we met with up there thought we should try IUI two more times and then begin in-vitro come July/August. I go in for more bloodwork and an ultrasound tomorrow to check my eggs, start another round of clomid Sunday and then we will begin the next round of IUI on May 23rd. I am trying to stay hopeful but I think I know deep down that the only way Baby Ricci is truly going to get here is going to either be through in-vitro or surrogacy. It’s strange, I have always known in my bones that I would have fertility problems but I never thought this is how I would become a mother. It’s a surreal reality to know that I will not ever be able to have children naturally and a feeling I can't put into words. I am feeling a little better about the situation though because at least we now are undergoing more serious infertility measures but I am truly counting down the days until we can begin the process of in-vitro, even though I completely petrified of giving myself shots and the whole harvesting of eggs thing. Even though I am scared, I am ready to do whatever it takes to get Baby Ricci here.
On a positive note, I did find two silver linings in this last cycle of IUI not working. First, I will now be able to attend my brother-in-law’s wedding in Trinidad & Tobago. The wedding is taking place in January and if this cycle had worked, I would have been due at that exact time. Since I am not pregnant though, off to Tobago we go! Second, we are getting into the due date months I really want for our child. I really didn’t want a November, December, January baby when we first started trying due to RSV and the whole holiday season birthday thing so now if I conceive anytime in the next 7 months, Baby Ricci will come from February to September, which I think is absolutely perfect! You have to take the small victories in this whole infertility journey.
Hoping all of you undergoing your treatments this month get better results than I did and that 2011 is the year for all of us!
In the midst of waiting for these results, we finally had our appointment up at the University of Utah Center for Reproductive Medicine, which was a good thing. They validated that we were on the right track and everything we were doing was necessary. The Dr. we met with up there thought we should try IUI two more times and then begin in-vitro come July/August. I go in for more bloodwork and an ultrasound tomorrow to check my eggs, start another round of clomid Sunday and then we will begin the next round of IUI on May 23rd. I am trying to stay hopeful but I think I know deep down that the only way Baby Ricci is truly going to get here is going to either be through in-vitro or surrogacy. It’s strange, I have always known in my bones that I would have fertility problems but I never thought this is how I would become a mother. It’s a surreal reality to know that I will not ever be able to have children naturally and a feeling I can't put into words. I am feeling a little better about the situation though because at least we now are undergoing more serious infertility measures but I am truly counting down the days until we can begin the process of in-vitro, even though I completely petrified of giving myself shots and the whole harvesting of eggs thing. Even though I am scared, I am ready to do whatever it takes to get Baby Ricci here.
On a positive note, I did find two silver linings in this last cycle of IUI not working. First, I will now be able to attend my brother-in-law’s wedding in Trinidad & Tobago. The wedding is taking place in January and if this cycle had worked, I would have been due at that exact time. Since I am not pregnant though, off to Tobago we go! Second, we are getting into the due date months I really want for our child. I really didn’t want a November, December, January baby when we first started trying due to RSV and the whole holiday season birthday thing so now if I conceive anytime in the next 7 months, Baby Ricci will come from February to September, which I think is absolutely perfect! You have to take the small victories in this whole infertility journey.
Hoping all of you undergoing your treatments this month get better results than I did and that 2011 is the year for all of us!
4 comments:
Lauren,
I was so hoping that this would be the month for you. I am so sorry...please, let me know if there is anything I can do for you!
You are in my thoughts constantly and I am anxiously awaiting a post that Baby Ricci is on its way!
Lauren I think you are truly amazing in your resilience. It's a credit to your sanity and your patience that you are willing to put your heart on the line month after month. I for one, cracked long ago. I knew I couldn't take it. So, give yourself credit as well. Love you and hoping this next attempt is the one.
our first tempt of ivf didnt work now we start over. The shots are really not bad i was terrified of needles but the are super small.The slide right in and the nurses show you how to do them. The progesterone needles are bigger i put a ice pack on the area to numb it before my husband gave me the shot. it sounds crazy but thats the only way i could do that shot for awhile.
I would love to meet you and sit down and talk about our journeys through this. Your post are always what i am thinking. It would be so nice to actually sit and talk to some one who can relate to what we are going through.
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