First of all, thanks to everyone who had their fingers/toes and everything else crossed or to those who sent well wishes and prayers our way for Baby Ricci. It was greatly appreciated and I felt much more in control this time around. Unfortunately even after believing whole heartedly this was our month, we recently learned that IUI didn’t work. While it was really difficult to get that news, we are grateful to be moving on to the next step of IVF and are anxious for this treatment to hopefully bring us Baby Ricci. When I learned IUI didn’t work, I felt really beaten down and drained both emotionally and physically and was extremely angry that once again I had been given heart shattering news. Luckily these feelings only lasted a day and I am now feeling at peace with everything and very (cautiously) optimistic.
Following the knowledge that IUI didn’t work, I scheduled an IVF consultation appointment. Although I thought I knew a lot about IVF, as I read over the papers they sent me prior to my appointment that discuss the shots, the mixing of the drugs, the timing, the harvesting, the transferring of embryos, the recovery, the process of developing embryos, the choice of how many embryos to implant and everything in between, I began to feel overwhelmed. Well today we went to our IVF consultation to discuss the process, timing and all of the drugs IVF involves and luckily Mike was able to attend with me. Mike tends to keep my head in a more logical vs. emotional place and it was nice to be able to sit down with him and our Dr. and ask all of the questions that have been running through our heads since I received the bad news. I left our appointment feeling empowered and although I am scared for the daily self injected shots and the magnitude of emotions that will come with them, I am a stronger woman than I give myself credit for and I know the fear is something I can overcome. I truly feel that even though I am not physically a mother, I emotionally have been for the past 28 months and am more than willing to put myself through hell and back and do everything physically possible to bring our little miracle into this world.
So as we move into Fall where the leaves change and the crispness in the air returns, our journey is also changing and I couldn’t be more anxious and excited. I look forward to hopefully learning good news at the end of October and to the lessons I will learn and the strength I am bound to gain as we endure the most invasive treatment yet. Please continue to join us and we continue on this crazy bumpy ride.
Following the knowledge that IUI didn’t work, I scheduled an IVF consultation appointment. Although I thought I knew a lot about IVF, as I read over the papers they sent me prior to my appointment that discuss the shots, the mixing of the drugs, the timing, the harvesting, the transferring of embryos, the recovery, the process of developing embryos, the choice of how many embryos to implant and everything in between, I began to feel overwhelmed. Well today we went to our IVF consultation to discuss the process, timing and all of the drugs IVF involves and luckily Mike was able to attend with me. Mike tends to keep my head in a more logical vs. emotional place and it was nice to be able to sit down with him and our Dr. and ask all of the questions that have been running through our heads since I received the bad news. I left our appointment feeling empowered and although I am scared for the daily self injected shots and the magnitude of emotions that will come with them, I am a stronger woman than I give myself credit for and I know the fear is something I can overcome. I truly feel that even though I am not physically a mother, I emotionally have been for the past 28 months and am more than willing to put myself through hell and back and do everything physically possible to bring our little miracle into this world.
So as we move into Fall where the leaves change and the crispness in the air returns, our journey is also changing and I couldn’t be more anxious and excited. I look forward to hopefully learning good news at the end of October and to the lessons I will learn and the strength I am bound to gain as we endure the most invasive treatment yet. Please continue to join us and we continue on this crazy bumpy ride.
1 comment:
I am so proud of you and so hopeful as well! Just wanted to leave you a little compliment...another pro to this blog has been your writing. I really enjoy reading it and have continued to be impressed as it keeps getting better and better over time. Thanks for sharing your soul. XOXO.
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