Sunday was a hard day. As much as I don't want to admit it and as much as I wish this emotion wasn't a part of my journey, I can't help but feel a tinge jealousy and sadness when I learn someone is pregnant the same time I learn I am not. This is a difficult emotion because it is an internal battle and makes me feel as though I have an angel and a devil on my shoulder. While I am incredibly happy for others who have received amazing news, I feel empty and sad that I myself am not hearing the same joyous news. It's crazy the gammet of emotions you experience when dealing with infertility.
Monday on the other hand was an incredible day. I was FINALLY able to get into Dr. Terry, who I have been waiting to see since October. The minute I met him I knew that he would help bring Baby Ricci into this world and that he would be my Dr. for as long as he would let me. He truly is great and made me feel so comfortable and optimistic about the future. He spent an hour with Mike and I discussing our history, listening to everything we have done and giving advice. When I told him my progesterone results following my first round of clomid, he felt that I HAD ovulated and that the clomid did it's job. He recommended another round of clomid at 50 mgs because he says "we want to keep you on the lowest dose that yield results" and if I don't ovulate on that, then we will talk about increasing my dose to 100 mgs. He then said he wanted to try this for 3-4 months and if that didn't work, we would go onto the next form of treatments, which would be surge results and Artificial Insemination. If that doesn't work, we will move onto a laproscopy and finally IVF. He was VERY confident though that a baby Ricci would either be here in 2011, or at least be making their presense known.
While Dr. Terry didn't give me any additional medication, he gave me something that was incredibly needed...hope. I can't tell you what a difference an optimistic Dr. will make and I am feeling so much more in control now that I have a medical support system behind me. I really do believe that 2011 is going to be our year!
Have a great weekend everyone!
1 comment:
I'm glad you found a doctor you like Lauren, that is always such a relief and comfort. I'm curious why your doctor is keeping you on the lower dose even though he gave his reason? There must be too much bad data out there for aggressively treating infertility. I never felt any of my doctors took my urgent desire to get pregnant serious. After the fact, I found out I had always been on the lowest possible treatments available. It baffled me why my doctor(s) hadn't been a little more aggressive. I don't mean to sow doubt but just food for thought I guess. You ARE the client, it seems like you should have some say in the risks you're willing to assume. Good luck in your next round Lauren. Keep your chin up. xx
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